Yesterday marked two years since Kevin passed away. Terrell, the girls and I started the day off with breakfast, then a trip to the cemetery. It was so good to be together on a day that can be so filled with highs and lows. The girls, in true form, were goofy as ever, which makes me forever grateful. There are times when I truly wish that pulling the cover over my head and shutting the world out would be an option, but it is not. For that, I am thankful. Kevin would not approve of me hiding under the blankets. He would want all of us to keep on living, so we do! These girls make it easy to do that.
Sometimes it is so difficult to express what it is like to miss someone that was such a huge part of our lives. I am very proud of Kendall, as she has been allowing herself to be more vulnerable and to express how she is feeling. As with all of us, sometimes it comes out pretty and sometimes it comes out 'crunchy' (yes, crunchy). Yesterday, she posted the most beautiful tribute to Kevin. Here are her words:
Its been 2 years. 2 years since you had to leave this earth. So much has changed. First off, I’m 13 now. Almost 14. Its so weird to me that I was only 11 when you had to leave. I think about you every day. A lot. All the time actually. But I have gotten a lot taller. Taller than mom, and Grandma Terrell and Grandma Karen. Almost grandpa. We are getting there. I took some online classes this summer. Did okay. I moved schools. I am going to West now. I miss the Farklers. A lot. But I still get to see them at youth group and sometimes church. Hannah has been amazing to me. I love her so much. I don’t know if I would be where I am without her. And I am still playing piano. I know you loved sitting in the sunroom and listening to me play. I got a keyboard in my room too. I love it. I still use the Grandma T’s piano though. Playing reminds me of you. You were so proud how I had found one thing that I was so passionate about. Grandma and Grandpa moved down to Boise. They live really close to Grandma Terrell. And she is still making food for an army every Sunday. She has grown so much. You would be really proud of her. Sidney and I are getting along a lot better. She has grown up so much. She is taking online school now. It is so good for her. And she rides horses too. You would be so proud of how good she is getting. She found her thing. It’s horses. I wish you could see her ride. She is incredible, and it makes her so happy. And Mom…She is working so hard. She is doing a great job raising us. You would be really proud of how strong she is. I know you wish you could be here to help her. But always in spirit. Anyways, as of early 2020, there is a global pandemic. Some people aren’t affected very much. Some die. We had to do online school in the spring. It was terrible. We weren’t in school after march. We have to wear masks around. Like the medical ones that we had to wear around the house when you were sick. The whole world has been in quarantine. But anyways, I miss you daddio. So much. And I love you. And I am so sad you had to leave but I am glad you are not in pain anymore. I love you. To the moon and back. A thousand times again.
Your daughter,
Kendall
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